Kürbisfest

I've never been much of an autumn person.
Sure, i've always liked walking by the lakes in Copenhagen in fall, collecting chestnuts to keep in my pockets and around the house, and i love the smell of rotten leaves, but other than that, it's just a little too... death-y, for me, i guess?
I know it's life and it's natural and we're lucky to live in a part of the world that has seasons, and blah blah blah, but i still don't like seeing things wither and die!

That being said, autumn in Berlin, even though super cold, is really nice.
Perhaps because Berliners are good at making a big deal out of things?
They are.
For example, a few weeks ago, one of our favorite streets in our neighborhood had a pumpkin themed street festival.
I mean, how can you not love that?
I was really sick that weekend, but i went out anyway, cause i don't wanna miss a good street fair, and i'm glad i did.
Not only did i get to buy some flower bulbs and eat flammkuchen, but i also got to see alpacas.
Actual alpacas! I could have stayed there and looked at them all day, and i nearly did.

Is this gonna be another one of those posts with way too many iPhone pictures?
Oh you bet it is!



Kürbis

I just wanted to buy them all

One black and one white... i wanted to steal them so bad

Church steps full of pumpkins

My new shoes bought in London, and the best client present: handmade rainbow colored legwarmers 

Gary and Larson are now so tame they come up to the door to get me to feed them

The next yard over has the most stunning autumn colors, probably because all the plants growing on the houses are different

A little cafe i still haven't eaten at, even though i often walk by, thinking "someday"

Panna Cotta... i need less of this in my life

We went to this great park on Sunday... that building is an ubahn station, if you can believe it... oh, Berlin

I know it ain't much, but i am happy that something, anything, is growing in my garden, and it gives me hope for next year

A few days ago, drawing in the attic with Lucifer

I have so many old thread spools, some of them are practically antiques (and this one finally made it back home!)

Our building manager, and her daughter and son in law, visited us on Sunday, and brought a lovely bouquet of lilies

One more, because alpacas



I think i've hinted at this before, but i've put on quite a bit of weight since we moved to Germany.
In the beginning, when we first got here, we didn't have time to cook (and way in the beginning we didn't even have a kitchen) and that was a good excuse to eat a lot of junkfood.
We also indulged and ate lots of new exotic chocolate and candy, and i felt it was ok to reward ourselves cause we were working so hard on the house we could barely think straight.
And everything was new.
I still feel that it was an ok thing to do, we did deserve it, but i so wish we hadn't done it, cause those pounds, the ones gained last winter and spring, are proving to be very stubborn and much harder to get rid of that i thought.

I mean, at first i didn't even really notice that i'd gained weight.
It's like it didn't happen gradually, it happened from one day to the next.
One day i was fine, i was normal, i was me, and the next day, my pants didn't fit.
A total fattie was looking back at me in the mirror.
And although i tried to be more conscious about my eating habits, i became depressed and overwhelmed, and i think i even sometimes ate more, because "this is pointless and impossible anyway, why even try?".
You know?

But enough is enough.
I'm gonna actually try.
I haven't been this overweight in many, many years, and losing weight is a hell of a lot harder now than it was when i was 24, but i've done it before and i can do it again.
I've started by actually acknowledging that i'm on a diet, and telling my friends about it too.
Some other steps i've taken are going out to dinner less (even if that sometimes also means being less social), exercising more (yesterday i worked out in the middle of the work day, cause i'm not good at doing it in the morning), and cutting way back on sugar (that's the hardest one for me, i am a complete and total addict).

I know that i won't necessarily be a happier person by losing weight.
Looking at old pictures of myself looking beautiful and skinny, to be honest, i clearly remember thinking i was fat back then too.
But maybe i'll get it right this time.
I have no illusions about having the perfect body.
I just want to fit into my pants again.

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