Wednesday, August 14, 2013

In which Flora Amalie of Schöneberg complains about hair and the people who cut it

There are some things that are just more difficult than others when moving to a new country.
The language barrier was expected, but it is still a lot wider than i'd imagined.
Finding and getting certain things are a hassle, making phone calls is impossible, and something as simple as receiving mail is more scary and confusing than i can even describe, while something like going to the supermarket is the easiest thing ever.
You never know what the obstacles are gonna be before you're actually there.
But i never thought getting a fucking haircut would end up being a problem in a city as big as Berlin!

The first time i got my hair cut in Berlin was sometime this winter.
I'd made a hair date with Sarah, and we both wanted something pretty simple: i needed my bangs trimmed and she wanted her hair washed and dried.
We both left the salon feeling ripped off, even though it was reasonably priced.
My bangs were crooked and uneven, and Sarah's hair just felt icky.
Not a success.

The next time wasn't too long ago, right before my birthday in June, i think, and it was an even worse experience.
The salon was cute and the girl cutting my hair seemed nice enough at first, but then it went downhill fast.
She started asking me about my hair quality, if my hair had always been this thin, why it was so bad, and things of that nature.
Basically insulting me and making me feel really bad about myself.
Now, going to get my hair cut have always been a bit of an anxiety trigger for me.
You put your head in someone's hands, trusting them to do their best to make you look good, and you have to sit and look at yourself in a mirror the whole time. It's a nightmare!
So the last thing you need if you're already uncomfortable, is for the person responsible for not making you look like an idiot to start pointing out your weaknesses.
As if i didn't fucking already know i have the worst hair ever!
Would you also like to take a shot at my acne and my weight issues?
There is really no need to tell a person that.
Maybe it's just misplaced German honesty, but hey, i don't need that, and i certainly shouldn't have to pay for it.
She even said "see you next time", as if i'd come back so she could take some more shots at my already low self esteem.

So i'm obviously in a bit of a situation right now, cause not only do i need my bangs cut real soon, i also kinda wanna chop off my shitty hair.
Not because of what that girl said, but i am realizing i'm never gonna have long pretty hair, and since it's not ever gonna look good at this length, and it's too thin for me to ever wear it down, and since i wear it up all the time anyway, i might as well cut it off, right?
But where i used to just go into a random salon and trust them to do a good job (which, in Copenhagen, they almost always did), i now know that Berlin hairdressers are... well, sloppy.
Oh yeah, the girl with the really twisted view on customer service also half-assed my haircut!
And from what i've read on the expat forums recently (well, one forum), bad haircuts are pretty much the norm here.
I do not know why that is, but now i really wish i'd just booked a time at a salon in Copenhagen when we were in Denmark.

Anyway, if any of you, my lovely readers, have a recommendation for a place in Berlin that won't fuck up my head completely, i'd be so grateful!

And just to make this whiny, ranty post* a little more interesting, here are some pictures of some of my past haircuts.
Not all good, i know, and some of these pictures are from awkward grow-out stages, but it's all still better than what's going on with my head now.
Finding these actually made me really depressed, cause i've gained so much weight since moving here, that i don't even look remotely the same as in these pictures, but i already knew that, so at least it wasn't a total surprise.
But still... damn. I need to do something about that too.
Oh, and i just added that last one cause me and Allan almost have the same hair, and we both look ridiculous!

I don't even remember getting this haircut... maybe it was when i was growing out the brunette Mia Farrow?

The mushroom! I remember that one, the others, not so much...

I'm probably gonna start with something like this and then go shorter

I loved this haircut so much i got it twice, but i don't think i'm ready to go that short yet... this is gonna sound stupid, but i feel like i'd need to get back to my normal weight to pull off a pixie cut, for some reason!?

Good god, Allan, that hair...

*Hey, it's been a long time since i've done one of those, right?


  1. fun to read , damn those german haircutters ^^

  2. That last picture is awesome. I know what you mean about haircut anxiety, it's the most stressful thing ever. You should come to Victoria, I know a few fantastic hair people. ;) (Most expensive haircut ever)

    1. I'd be so willing to pay A LOT of money if i knew it meant they'd at least try to do a good job.

  3. Well, that's the reason why I cut and dye my own hair. Actually I think that since I started doing that my hair is somehow healthier and not so thin anymore. Maybe you should think about that. :)

    1. I do occasionally dye my own hair with plant based products, and i'd never get a salon to do that, but somehow i don't think me trying to give myself an amateur haircut will make my hair any thicker. Sadly.

    2. Well maybe it would work because then you would cut your hair more often. For thicker hair you can also try olive oil, if you haven't done it already. I use it as a hair mask and i couldn't be happier with the results.

  4. I absolutely love the pixie cut on you! Not many people can pull it off but you really do!

    I totally can relate to the post. I hate my hair! I hate that it won't grow! I hate that it's a frizz bomb! I hate it, I want to shave it off.

    Getting your hair done is a massive anxiety and when you have dick head 'stylists' think its ok to put you down, well it ain't ok!

    I really want a fringe again but I hate people telling me how young I look. It pisses me off.

    Please don't be down about your weight. You look fabulous. I know how down it can get you thought. I don't have the best relationship with food tbh. I've also put on over 3 stone since being diagnosed with fibromyalgia. I can't even begin to tell you how much this depresses me.

    I hope you manage to find a good stylist. Surely there's gotta be one out there, right!?

    1. Thanks, you'd think there has to be at least one good stylist out there, but how to find them?!
      The weight issue is such a bummer, but it's my own fault, i should have been more careful with what i was eating when we moved here, but it just wasn't high on my list of priorities at the time.

  5. Weight issues, hair issues, I feel ya, I really do but these times they do pass and I don't think the summer helps with it's heat and humidity and all the little tiny clothes we have to wear just to avoid heatstroke going to the supermarket. But we both need to remember that we have lovely men in our lives who barely notice our wobbly bums (and certainly not in a negative way) because they are too busy loving us because we rock.

    I know I've only met you in the real world a couple of times and one of those times Allan was doing painful yet beautiful things to my leg so I wasn't much of a conversation partner but you're cool and pretty AND real (as in keepin' it real) which is more than can be said for the majority of people I've known for a lot longer.

    I'm currently growing my hair out from my crop so have spent most of the summer looking like a Victorian street urchin and have been completely avoiding places like Harajuku as there are just too many beautiful teenagers for my self esteem to handle. I'm lucky as my hairdresser is great and very positive even when I'm bitching about how crappy my hair is. He also seems to instinctively know when I'm in the mood for inane chatter and when I just want to be left to read a magazine. If you can wait until November for a haircut then I would wholeheartedly recommend him (plus he's worked in Europe so it totally used to "foreign" hair).

    And YES, a Takao-san trip would be fab!

    Hugs x

    1. You're so right, Allan luckily barely notices when i gain weight, he's too busy trying to get some, haha!
      Avoiding hip places is a must if you're not feeling like you're looking your best, i agree. That's why i'm so happy we live in such a lame part of town!
      You know, the worst part about the weight gain isn't even the way i look, cause i can totally live with that. It's the fact that i can't fit 90% of my clothes, and i really miss them! I feel like i look less like me, cause i can't wear what i want to. So that's actually my mail motivator; getting my wardrobe back!

      I don't think i can wait until November, but maybe it'll be time for a bang trim then?

      Good luck with growing yours out!!

  6. I had always (up until a few years ago) hated hairdressers & have always cut my own hair: I seriously feel your pain. Cutting your fringe (gah, bangs) is actually super easy & I haven't let anyone cut mine in ten years. If you happen to be in London (I know, not exactly helpful) go visit Elbie! She's fucking awesome. I haven't had my hair cut by her but she has dyed it, and she did that perfectly. She does all her magic from her own home, plies you with tea & makes you welcome.

    Good luck with your search!

    1. Man, i am actually tempted to wait until i have to go to London or Tokyo!
      Your hair looks pretty damn great, so maybe it's woth waiting...

      Ps. Fun fact, bangs are called "pandehår" in Danish which means "foreheadhair"!

    2. Damn it! I want foreheadhair! Haha

  7. Woow, you look so good with that pixie haircut!
    I just want to tell you that, although I haven't met you, you just seem as an awesome person and that you look beautiful :)
    When I moved back to DK from Berlin in the winter, my plan was to get a tattoo from Allan, but then you two moved to Berlin at the same time. At some time I must go to Berlin and get that done :)

    Best wishes Henriette

    1. Hi,

      Thanks so much, i might get that cut again some day!
      Please do come to Berlin and get tattooed some time :)

  8. i love the last one and also the pixie cut :) you´ve got the prettiest face! x

  9. Hi Amalie !
    I read your blog since years now and you always seemed a bit insecure about your hair. I'm not writing this to take you down at all but it would may be a good idea you learn how to cut your hair ?
    I used to hate haircuts, cause sometimes french hairdressers are so rude and expensive, and the all process is very awkard. My mother in law taugth me to cut my hair and it feels reaaally good to be able to do it yourself and not having to ever enter a salon.

    1. A lot insecure, i'd say, haha!
      I am normally a do-it-yourself kinda girl, but when it comes to hair, i feel like i should be able to go to a salon and get a professional cut, by a person trained in that craft.
      It should be a luxurious and pleasant experience, something you look forward to doing for yourself, and just cause i haven't found a place that can provide that, i don't think i'm gonna give up just yet.
      I'll at least give the industry one more chance before i call your mother in law :)

  10. I have heard that the Aveda Berlin institute is meant to be very good. Have seen a fair bit of their work and the people I have met that work there are amazing and passionate about hair? I know what you mean though, if your hair feels like rubbish then the rest of you does too!

    1. Thanks for that, i saw a comment on some forum that recommended them too!

  11. No worries! Aveda are lovely products too. Hope you find a good hairdresser soon :)

  12. Did you already find a good hairdresser? :)