Wednesday, August 14, 2013

In which Flora Amalie of Schöneberg complains about hair and the people who cut it

There are some things that are just more difficult than others when moving to a new country.
The language barrier was expected, but it is still a lot wider than i'd imagined.
Finding and getting certain things are a hassle, making phone calls is impossible, and something as simple as receiving mail is more scary and confusing than i can even describe, while something like going to the supermarket is the easiest thing ever.
You never know what the obstacles are gonna be before you're actually there.
But i never thought getting a fucking haircut would end up being a problem in a city as big as Berlin!

The first time i got my hair cut in Berlin was sometime this winter.
I'd made a hair date with Sarah, and we both wanted something pretty simple: i needed my bangs trimmed and she wanted her hair washed and dried.
We both left the salon feeling ripped off, even though it was reasonably priced.
My bangs were crooked and uneven, and Sarah's hair just felt icky.
Not a success.

The next time wasn't too long ago, right before my birthday in June, i think, and it was an even worse experience.
The salon was cute and the girl cutting my hair seemed nice enough at first, but then it went downhill fast.
She started asking me about my hair quality, if my hair had always been this thin, why it was so bad, and things of that nature.
Basically insulting me and making me feel really bad about myself.
Now, going to get my hair cut have always been a bit of an anxiety trigger for me.
You put your head in someone's hands, trusting them to do their best to make you look good, and you have to sit and look at yourself in a mirror the whole time. It's a nightmare!
So the last thing you need if you're already uncomfortable, is for the person responsible for not making you look like an idiot to start pointing out your weaknesses.
As if i didn't fucking already know i have the worst hair ever!
Would you also like to take a shot at my acne and my weight issues?
There is really no need to tell a person that.
Maybe it's just misplaced German honesty, but hey, i don't need that, and i certainly shouldn't have to pay for it.
She even said "see you next time", as if i'd come back so she could take some more shots at my already low self esteem.

So i'm obviously in a bit of a situation right now, cause not only do i need my bangs cut real soon, i also kinda wanna chop off my shitty hair.
Not because of what that girl said, but i am realizing i'm never gonna have long pretty hair, and since it's not ever gonna look good at this length, and it's too thin for me to ever wear it down, and since i wear it up all the time anyway, i might as well cut it off, right?
But where i used to just go into a random salon and trust them to do a good job (which, in Copenhagen, they almost always did), i now know that Berlin hairdressers are... well, sloppy.
Oh yeah, the girl with the really twisted view on customer service also half-assed my haircut!
And from what i've read on the expat forums recently (well, one forum), bad haircuts are pretty much the norm here.
I do not know why that is, but now i really wish i'd just booked a time at a salon in Copenhagen when we were in Denmark.

Anyway, if any of you, my lovely readers, have a recommendation for a place in Berlin that won't fuck up my head completely, i'd be so grateful!

And just to make this whiny, ranty post* a little more interesting, here are some pictures of some of my past haircuts.
Not all good, i know, and some of these pictures are from awkward grow-out stages, but it's all still better than what's going on with my head now.
Finding these actually made me really depressed, cause i've gained so much weight since moving here, that i don't even look remotely the same as in these pictures, but i already knew that, so at least it wasn't a total surprise.
But still... damn. I need to do something about that too.
Oh, and i just added that last one cause me and Allan almost have the same hair, and we both look ridiculous!

I don't even remember getting this haircut... maybe it was when i was growing out the brunette Mia Farrow?

The mushroom! I remember that one, the others, not so much...

I'm probably gonna start with something like this and then go shorter

I loved this haircut so much i got it twice, but i don't think i'm ready to go that short yet... this is gonna sound stupid, but i feel like i'd need to get back to my normal weight to pull off a pixie cut, for some reason!?

Good god, Allan, that hair...

*Hey, it's been a long time since i've done one of those, right?

Saturday, August 10, 2013

Beyond the sea

We just came back from a weeks vacation in Bisserup.
Or, more or less just came back.
We went there for my mom's birthday and decided to stay for a few extra days to spend time with family, and work on some projects.
Spend time with family we did, but the projects stayed in our one suitcase, and i actually think that was for the better.
I had no idea how much i needed a break until we got there and although he'd be reluctant to admit it, i'm sure Allan needed one too.

We took a lot of walks, and me and my mom went swimming every day.
We had good food, mostly leftovers from the party, and my mom taught herself to make a mean pina colada, so we had a few of those too.
And we collected skulls and boiled them on an outdoor stove right up until the moment we had to leave.
I had the absolute weirdest dreams all week, but no anxiety whatsoever, so that felt like a good tradeoff.

Whenever i'm in Bisserup, i get this sneaking suspicion that i'm actually meant to live by the sea, but it's too late for that now that i'm an inlander.
But that's ok.
Coming home to Berlin, even though i'm still not quite used to this being the place-i-come-home-to, and i still refer to both Denmark and Berlin as "home", was really nice too.

We skipped Copenhagen this time, as much as we could.
Went straight from the airport to the central station to change trains, and from there to the country, and we did the same on the way home.
It's not that i can't handle Copenhagen, or i don't want to see people there, i just really didn't wanna deal with it this time around.
Our visit in May, and staying at a hotel, was just too weird, and since then, i just haven't felt like visiting.
I guess i was just so tired of Copenhagen for so long, and to really get over that, i need more time and more distance between me and the city i got so sick of.
It's not you, Copenhagen, it's me!

Anyway, it was great to spend time with my parents and the rest of the family, my nephew in particular.
And swimming in the ocean, not that there's anything wrong with lakes, was pretty fucking wonderful too.

Here are some pictures, mostly of water, which i guess reveals the one thing i could use a little more of in Schöneberg.
There are some of my mom and dad too, of Allan playing the drums for the first time in like 15 years, and Gilbert also playing the drums and being adorable in general, of Lucifer on a boat and me being a fatty on the beach.

Oh, and my mom is exhibiting her water color paintings in their art gallery at the moment.
Even though it's basically her gallery, this is the first time in many years she's had her own work on display, and it's a beautiful show, with lovely paintings of the local scenery.
There's no website, but should you find yourself on southwestern Sjælland, the address is Galleri Stalden, Bisserup Havnevej 62, 4243 Rude.


Analog photos to come when i've had them developed!