I'm taking 5 minutes to blog, dammit, even if i don't have much to say.
We're still in packing hell.
I am currently at the shop, trying to take care of a few things while completely surrounded by boxes and more stuff that needs to be put into boxes.
It's been hard. It IS hard, and i am never, ever moving house and shop to another country again, with less than two weeks to pack.
Holy shitsnacks is that nowhere near enough, and for two people to handle alone?
No, too much.
But it'll be over soon, making way for entirely new problems, i'm sure, but mostly new adventures.
The stress of packing has brought out some anxiety, and anxiety brings out doubts.
I hadn't had them much before, cause i'm impulsive, i guess, but all of a sudden my brain was asking me if i'd thought this through (somewhat?), if moving to another country was even a good idea (i don't know, time will tell) and telling me, as anxiety brains do, that i can't handle it, it'll be too much, i'll break down or lose my shit eventually.
Sure, that's possible, but not likely. What seems impossible to deal with one day, often doesn't seem like such a huge deal the next.
One day at a time, and i'll be ok.
And Berlin will be fun, and different, and probably very frustrating. And it'll be an adventure.
While packing at home, i found a letter to myself, written during as month i spent in an empty house in Goa with a Danish friend, two British dudes and a stray dog, in 2001.
It was pretty funny, hilarious actually, but it also happened to mention how good i am at adapting to new places.
And it's true, i had completely accepted living in India within two days, and whenever i'm in Japan, i feel like i could stay forever.
Maybe it's different with a place like Germany cause it's still very similar to Denmark, maybe too similar? But in any case, i'm trying to trust in my ability to adapt. Trust that it's still there.
And if not, then i at least still have my favorite dog, and my favorite person, there with me, and anywhere they are can't be that bad.
Someone came in and i lost my train of though, but whatever, i need to get back to packing anyway.
Last week i took 15 minutes out of my day to get a cheap haircut, and that's the best thing i've done for myself in a long time.
I tried no bangs for about a year and a half, but this, super short Vulcan bangs, is what i always come back to.
I feel like i look like myself again.
I'm not sure if i'll have time to post again before the move, so maybe the next post will be from Sarah's apartment where we're staying until our stuff arrives.
Wish us luck.
Before and after*
*I've been wearing the same work overalls for like a week... Allan and David are calling me a Doozer and believe the look increases my work efficiency!